Open Happiness

Originally post on My Life Is Like A Song on December 19, 2009

The first thing that I want do
Make sure that you feel it too
So I'm not the only one

Coke introduced a new campaign last January entitled Open Happiness and had a song in its commercials.

They have released a Canadian version of the song that they are using during the Olympic Torch Relay. I heard it the other night at the City Torch Relay Celebration.



This version features Kardinal Offishall, Bedouin Soundclash's Jay Malinowski, and cœur de pirate. This is reminding me that a friend (stv) had recommended cœur de pirate a while ago. Just realized I never downloaded any of her songs, so just went to download Comme des Enfants as a start. It's funny how things come around sometimes. She'll be performing in Vancouver and Whistler during the Olympics.

They also have a bilingual version where cœur de pirate sings her part in French.



I love Jay Malinowski's voice. I noticed it the other night when the song started playing. I'll definitely be looking into Bedouin Soundclash again. I loved When The Night Feels My Song from a few years ago, but didn't download more than that.

Kardinal won the Juno Award for Single of the Year for Dangerous in 2009 and performs on the Estelle track Magnificient. I'm sure he has a lot more credits, but these are the two songs that appear on our iTunes playlist. He ran in the Torch Relay 15 minutes earlier than I saw it in my neighbourhood. Cool!

The song can be downloaded for free at www.icoke.ca

C'mon lift me up
it's a brand new day
Open up a lil happiness today

Torch Relay In Toronto

First published on December 18, 2009 on My Life Is Like a Song

This is my 200th blog post...and 100th post in 2009!! Thank you for sharing my blog with me.


Last night I gave a summary and initial impression of my day following the Torch Relay in Toronto.

This is my more detailed account after reviewing my photos, videos and telecast. I was in for some surprises.

I started by driving up to North York to see the Torch Relay in the daytime. I parked just south of Mel Lastman Square. I then walked north for about 15 minutes (almost 10 blocks) until the convoy was approaching. The RBC truck came first handing out RBC Olympic Relay flags and then the Coke truck came by handing out commemorative painted aluminum Coke bottles. In my rush to get to Yonge Street (there was a lot of cheering when I was parking so I wrongly thought they were already approaching), I left my bag in the car figuring I wouldn't need it if I wouldn't be waiting long. So I now had a bottle, a flag and one mitt in my left hand (having no where else to put them) and a camera in my right hand. I learned that I need to practice taking photos with one hand because I kept pushing buttons I didn't want pushed. The camera is quite small and most of the buttons are on the back face where I was trying to hold it.

I looked for the orange dots on the lampposts to find a spot where the flame would be exchanged. A torchbearer was soon dropped off and so many spectators went up to him wanting their photo taken with him (even strangers). In a way this was good, but in another, he probably wasn't able to completely soak in the moment watching the flame arrive as he was busy posing for photographs.

The flame arrived and was transferred.


I did take a moment to appreciate the torch arriving from afar but then, I clicked. One of the reasons I wanted to go on my own in the afternoon was so I would get my photo-taking over with.

It was also a good opportunity to see how it all worked so that I would ensure a good experience with the kids when we would get only one chance (no running or following for them).

Once the flame was lit, I followed it down Yonge Street.

I managed to keep up with this torchbearer (Marien Gehrels) and saw him transfer the flame to the following torchbearer (Kevin Chambers). I caught up after Kevin passed the flame. I didn't see who the next torchbearer was (more on that later). I stayed and watched as the crowd took photos of Kevin and watched him board the torchbearer bus.

I thought this would be it for my experience. I couldn't keep up with the pace of the relay, but then for some reason (I didn't know it at the time, I did end up catching up). I still had to go south to get back to my car. After watching the telecast on television, I see that the next torchbearer walked the last part of his relay. The crowd was so large that it slowed down the convoy (and this was the rowdy crowd I had heard from my car).

It turns out that this torchbearer who I couldn't see because of the crowd, but I could see the flame he was carrying was Craig Kielburger. In case you don't know who he is, I have blogged about him in the past. He founded Free The Children with his brother Marc. You can read what I wrote here.

So complete bummer that I didn't realize that he was there...this is one of my annoyances with the torch relay (and perhaps done purposefully to prevent immense crowds in certain areas). CP24 was showing the names of the torchbearers (where I got their names).

I wrote the following before knowing who the next torchbearer was (who ended up being Craig's brother Marc Kielburger):

The following torchbearer was probably my favourite of the ones I saw. He really took the time to appreciate the moment. He kept thanking the crowd for coming as you can hear in this video...



...and he really tried to look on both sides and wave to the people who were lining the street.

He looked right at me once when I took a photo, but the camera hadn't focused properly.


He then passed the flame to a younger torchbearer (turns out to be Ferdinard Ismael).


This is probably my favourite photo. I love how close I managed to get. I love the look on his face and the younger one looking up at the flame. The crowd control was really not as tight at this point as it would be later in my neighbourhood.

After this transfer, I lost touch with the flame for a bit. I was walking down Yonge, again figuring this was the end of my experience as the flame got further and further away from me. I can still picture myself walking down, looking at the flame with a huge grin on my face...and looking at everyone around me with cameras and also smiling.

It was really an amazing experience.

In hindsight, how did I get so close to Marc Kielburger? I'm watching it on television and the crowd is so big. At one point, the crowd covers the street (the camera truck ahead is filming the crowd and can't see Marc). In hindsight, it also explains why Marc is taking his time and making sure he waves to everyone...so cool!

When the flame gets passed, they do stop for a minute or so, this gave me the opportunity to get close to the flame again. The following torchbearer (Lindsay Leo) began by walking. When I realized this, I ran to catch up to her.


I caught up with the last torchbearer when they stopped to transfer the flame to the small "torch" to be transported by convoy on the 401 to Scarborough.

After they took the smaller flame to the convoy, I stayed by the last torchbearer, watching the flame...

and then watching as they extinguished it.




This photo of the last torchbearer I think is a good representation of how all the torchbearers felt when they were done. I love the expression on his face! It shows the pride and the pure joy of experiencing (for most) a once-in-a-lifetime event.

I wrote the previous few sentences before realizing that this is Richard Peddie. The CEO and GM of Maple Leaf Sports and Entertainment.

So my afternoon consisted of 5 torchbearers...300m each, so 1.5km in 20 minutes!

(editing this comment after reviewing the telecast...6 torchbearers (I had missed Kevin in my count plus Craig that I didn't really see)...300m each, so 2.1km in 20 minutes!! My first photo was taken at 2:17pm and my last one at 2:37pm.

This is what I called my whirlwind Torch Relay experience.

I was ready for my neighbourhood Torch Relay experience with my children.

I had planned on going to the end of my street and finding the closest orange sticker on a pole signifying a transfer of the flame.

I was watching the telecast when the reporter said she was just north of Eglinton (I missed where she was exactly) and that she was at the spot where Ivan Reitman (director of Stripes, Ghostbusters as well as many other films) would pass the flame to his son Jason Reitman (director of Up In The Air that was nominated for Golden Globe and SAG Awards this week).

Having seen the crowds running down following the torch and converging where the flame is being passed, I figured that this was not the place for my children to be. Especially since a lot of the time, security, media and spectators stand in front of where you are.

When I got to Yonge, we see the CTV truck and the reporter. The Reitman exchange is happening just north of our street at 5:15pm.

We walked further north, but then I realized that the previous transfer would be popular as well with Ivan Reitman receiving the flame. After a brief discussion, we decided to stay near our street and watch the torch pass (rather than a transfer). The kids were excited (ok, me too) to receive glow-in-the-dark Coke bottles to wave as the torch went by. Very cool to see the torch in the dark (and happy I also saw in the daytime). Being in between transfer points, we did get a good vantage point of Ivan Reitman walking past with the torch.



We got home happy with our experience. Not taking the time to inspect the glow-in-the-dark bottles, I took photos thinking they were like glow-in-the-dark necklaces that would only glow for a limited time (turns out they have an on-off switch and possibly have batteries).

(how cool are they?)

My torch relay experience continued by going downtown to meet my husband at Nathan Phillips Square for the city celebration. The torch was supposed to arrive at 7pm but was delayed an hour because protestors disrupted the route, but we were not told why the torch was late. The celebration seemed to go without a hitch (if I hadn't known that the torch was late), but I arrived late, so perhaps people who had been there since the beginning saw some repeated performances or videos. I haven't watched the full telecast yet, so can't comment on the delay.

After some entertaining performances, the torch arrived carried by Vicky Sunohara who won 2 gold medals and one silver medal in women's ice hockey. We couldn't see the flame come across the ice rink on the red carpet (saw that on the telecast afterwards), but we could see the flame go through the crowd, up to the stage.




We were quite far, but with our zoom lens, my husband captured the torch as it was about to light the cauldron and then the lit cauldron.












The lighting of the cauldron was followed by Vicky being interviewed and by speeches by federal, provincial and municipal politicians.

We ended up having to leave early and as we were leaving, I noticed an aluminum bottle on the ground. I picked it up (it was empty...I wasn't planning on opening mine) and brought it home so that I would have a pair of bottles (turns out it didn't smell like coke when we opened it)...Did I mention that it was a really cold day and evening (for Toronto)?

So, I had a full day relishing my time in the presence of the Torch Relay. I have some souvenirs to remember this day:
The middle two bottles are the front and back view of the glow-in-the-dark bottles. The two red flags are also the same (different view).

I just learned today that Steve Nash will be carrying the torch in the relay the day before the Opening Ceremonies. Barring a snow storm or other flight delay, I will already be in Vancouver/Victoria that day. Hopefully I can find out where he'll be and perhaps have another torch relay experience.

This is happiness!

Dream Big

First published on November 14, 2009 on My Life Is Like A Song

When I was a little boy
I swore that I would change the world
when I grew up
Nothing else would be enough

I see it everyday
We settled for safe
And lose ourselves along the way

'Cause if you don't dream big
what's the use of dreaming
(Dream Big by David Cook)

Last spring, I saw a presentation from Mothers On Fire. You can read what I wrote about it here in case you want the background to this post.

This fall, I saw a second presentation from Mothers on Fire. I was going to write about it, but then got sidetracked when I read what I wrote about the first presentation and was reminded that I hadn't been a "mother on fire" since that first presentation (which was a couple of days after getting a puppy). You can read that post here.

So now, I will write about the second presentation by Brenda Jasmin of Mothers on Fire.

This presentation didn't resonate as much with me as the first one, maybe because it's not as much fun as the first one "Finding Your Inner Fire". It was about "Getting Over Guilt".

I guess I do feel guilty about some aspects of parenting and homemaking but I rarely feel guilty about having time for myself like a lot of mothers do.

I believe that the main reason I am like this is because of my husband. He always believed in the importance of his activities and his friends and always encouraged me whenever I had an opportunity to go out with my friends or for activities I enjoyed. It has been a give and take for us. I never questioned the activities that were important to him and he never questioned the activities that were important to me. We supported each other.

The timing was good to hear about guilt though (and to revisit that first presentation) because I struggled with the first few months of having a puppy. Being at a mother's group and listening to moms talk about feeling guilty for not being able to accomplish as much as they used to, it reminded me that I am a new mother. I hadn't really made the realization that I do have a newborn that I have been taking care of...it's just not a human newborn but a puppy.

Brenda also talked about being a "good enough" mother and not a "perfect" mother. This again, was not an ideal topic for me. I don't think I ever pretended that I could be a perfect mother. I think I let go of perfection in motherhood early on. (I do have perfectionist tendencies though but that's a different topic altogether) So when we were talking about what a "perfect" mother is like, I never tried to achieve the characteristics of the "perfect" mother.

Could I be a better mother than I am? Yes I could, and I keep trying to improve but perfect was never what I tried to achieve.

This presentation was a great reminder for me though to let go of the guilt of the past few months and make sure that as I try to make my dreams come true, I don't feel guilty in the future.

My favourite items on the Top Ten List for Getting Over Guilt include:

• Resist the urge to compare yourself and your children to others.
• Find times to be present for your kids.
• Take time to acknowledge what you have accomplished.
• Let go of the opinions of others (and society) and listen to your own inner voice.
• Remember that when you also take care of your own needs and do things that make you happy, your loved ones benefit.
• Connect your activity to your deeper values and dreams.

Mothers on Fire has reminded me to follow my dreams. I have been writing a lot about it in the past few months. With the Olympics being held in my country in less than 100 days, my dream of attending the Olympic Games has been my focus.

I am one step closer today to realizing that dream. After over four hours of two computers refreshing every 30 seconds and my fingers redialing for tickets yesterday, I managed to secure a ticket to the Opening Ceremony.

There are still some walls to surmount before I get there, but this is the first step. Now that I have a ticket, I will continue to work at fulfilling my dream by booking a flight, arranging accommodation, arranging for my kids and puppy care and of course, work on my finances (this is not a cheap dream). The biggest challenge will be ensuring that Mother Nature doesn't wreak havoc with my dream. It will be February in Canada. Snow storms happen. Flights get cancelled. I am trying to make sure that I take all these "walls" into consideration as I plan my trip.

I do believe that if I had not been introduced to Mothers on Fire, I would not be going to the Olympic Games this winter. I had given up on that dream last year when I looked at getting tickets for my whole family and realized financially (and logistically) it was not realistic. The timing of those two presentations was perfect for me. Would I rather go to the Olympics with my family? Absolutely!! But going alone is better than not going at all and going alone is realistic and doable.

When trying to make dreams come true, we will come up against walls. You can read my post about "they're just walls" here. These walls are not meant to stop us, but to make us show how much we want something. Unfortunately, I learned this lesson late in life (but fortunately not too late). I used to give up on my dreams too easily.

I hope that my going to the Olympic Games will teach my children to Dream Big. We don't know what we are capable of until we climb over, dig under, go around or knock those walls down.

'Cause if you don't dream big what's the use of dreaming

Partial Dream Come True

Originally appeared on My Life is Like A Song on November 4, 2009

They say that when we write our dreams down, we should be specific. In case you have missed my recent posts about my dreams, go back a few posts to fill in the gaps.

After one friend called to share his viewing of the Olympic Torch going by in Victoria, another friend of mine got to carry the Olympic Torch in the Olympic Relay.

What a wonderful surprise I got while I was preparing dinner last night to have that friend (who had just flew home that day) show up at my door with a long box containing THE Olympic Torch....ok, HIS Olympic Torch (since there are over 12000 of them)....but an Olympic Torch that has been lit with THE Olympic Flame!

To make things even better, he leaves the Olympic Torch with me to enjoy for 24 hours.

Seriously???? He's going to leave it with me?

A friend of mine described this photo of me with the words..."it looks like you're a kid in a candy store". Imagine if I actually got to run in the relay...what would that photo look like? LOL

So last night, I called my family and some friends to share my happiness. More than one person said, isn't your dream to carry an Olympic Torch? This could be your dream come true.

I did think that this could be as close as I get to my dream this year. I will watch the Torch Relay run past down the road from where I live. I will go downtown to see the Torch Relay Celebration...but I am now actually TOUCHING and HOLDING an Olympic Torch. I probably won't get to hold a lit one so this could be as good as it gets.

I may not get to Vancouver to be AT the Olympic Games.

So last night, we had dinner with the Olympic Torch on the table. I toasted with the favourite Canadian wine I had (Weir Wine Pinot Noir) and felt very blessed to have a friend who shared his experience with me.

I think it's very beautiful. It's long and curvy with the Vancouver 2010 inukshuk logo. It is heavy when you first pick it up, but for its size I didn't find it too heavy. I could easily run the 300m distance with it. The inspiration for its shape was:

"Canada’s open land, vast potential and smooth, fluid lines left in the snow and ice from winter sports"

This is what it looks like when it's lit:

You can see the evidence left behind from the lit flame on this photo.

On the one side, it has a bilingual inscription of
"With Glowing Hearts"
"Des Plus Brilliants Exploits"

On the other side there is a beautiful (because we know how much I love...) a maple leaf.

The stainless line on both sides are supposed to represent the blade of a skate.

I did look to see what I wrote as my dream in my book (whether it was to carry the torch or not). It says to...

"attend the Olympic Games" and then thinking that travelling across the country (or to another country) being a little unrealistic amended it to...

"be a torchbearer for the 2010 Olympics".

So, to those saying that I have realized my dream...just carrying an Olympic torch is not my dream...it is to BE a torchbearer for the 2010 Olympics. I was specific ;-)

It does not look like this dream will happen. I may be a torchbearer for a later Olympics. Who knows? And to be quite frank, I am a dreamer enough to still believe that somehow perhaps something could happen to make me a torchbearer. The Relay hasn't reached my province yet. But I am realistic enough to fully appreciate the experience I had last night...and today as I sit to write this with the Olympic Torch in sight.

I will chalk this up to a partial dream, and learn from the experience if the full dream doesn't happen.

They're Just Walls

Originally published on My Life Is Like A Song on November 3, 2009

It doesn't matter what's in front of you
It's smaller than it seems
So don't you stop
Until they fall
They're just walls
(Walls by Ross Copperman)

A few weeks ago, I read The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch. If you think back a year or two, you may remember the professor who had terminal cancer and gave a "last lecture" - Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams.

My mother was reading it over Thanksgiving weekend and I got it the following week to read.
The timing of me reading this book was perfect since the possibility of me achieving one of my childhood dreams is just around the corner.

You will know that in the last month, I have been thinking about my Olympic dream and trying to find out how to make it happen.

My favourite quote from The Last Lecture is:

Brick walls are there for a reason:
they let us prove how badly we want things.

I have been talking about brick walls a lot in the past few weeks. I have been thinking about all the brick walls I have come across with relation to my Olympic Dream in particular (and my other dreams).

Yesterday, one of my favourite singers posted a song on his My Space page. I couldn't believe my ears when I heard it. You can listen to it at www.myspace.com/rosscopperman

Here are the lyrics (as I hear them):

Maybe it's the way they look at you
Their eyes telling you
That everything you do
Is never going to be good enough
They'll try to crush
The love you have inside
When you're just about to fly

So don't give up
Find your way around
Yeah don't give in
Til they all come crashing down
It doesn't matter what's in front of you
It's smaller than it seems
So don't you stop
Until they fall
They're just walls

I'm my own worse enemy
Sometimes I can't see
The forest through the trees
I get lost
I get paralyed
Then I realize
That I can see a light
Breaking through the other side

So don't give up
Find your way around
Yeah don't give in
Til they all coming crashing down
It doesn't matter what's in front of you
It's smaller than it seems
So don't you stop
Until they fall
They're just walls

When I told my husband (who has a blog about coincidences) he said (and this is my favourite quote for today):

"That's not a coincidence, that's the definition of synchronicity".

So, my dream to attend the Olympic Games may still not come true. I'm not saying that just because I read a book or sing a song that I will be able to surmount the walls I keep coming up against, but it is giving me motivation to try to scale them, go around them or knock them down.

If my dream doesn't come true, I will remember another great quote by Randy Pausch:

Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted.

2010 Olympic Relay

Originally published on My Life Is Like A Song on October 30, 2009

The Olympic Torch Relay began today. Is Canada excited?

I got invited (along with million others) to join the world's "longest wave". Petro Canada is broadcasting people on webcam doing the wave. You can view it here. But seriously...I want to be there!! Not doing the wave in my living room. Is that too much to ask?

I think I was excited in 1988 when Calgary hosted. From where I am presently sitting, I can see my "Share The Flame" book from the '88 Torch Relay.

So, we have another Torch Relay in this country...and it makes me want to cry rather than cheer.

At the moment, I can't imagine wanting to buy a book about the 2010 Torch Relay if I'm not part of it. I can barely watch the news about it. I feel that I should be excited about the torch arriving in my home country...about us hosting the Games. I was so excited when it was first announced (at the time I thought I would be there)...but now it makes me want to cry...thinking that I won't be a part of our home Olympics.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not bitter enough to not want to go to the Toronto celebrations when the Torch arrives (it's been on my calendar all year - although it's been in my calendar with the assumption that I would be carrying the torch...but it's still in my calendar now that I know I won't).

The relay is described as reaching most Canadians...going within an hour or of 90% of Canadians.  At the moment, I want to find a friend who will be carrying the Flame and go cheer him/her on wherever they are rather than watch a stranger carry the flame on Yonge Street at the end of my street!! I'm also planning on being downtown for the celebrations.

I have been on the mailing list for the games for a couple of years. I looked into getting tickets when they first went on sale, then chickened out when I realized how much it would cost for a family of 4 to go to Vancouver for the Games.

I mentioned on an earlier post about the dreams I listed in 1996. One was to attend the Olympic Games.

In 2008, I amended that dream to running in the Torch Relay (instead of attending). I figured this was a more realistic goal. At the time, it never occurred to me that I wouldn't be chosen. I figured that for my dream to be to go to the Olympics...running in the relay would be so much easier...no travelling involved...and really, being involved with the Olympics is my destiny, right?

Apparently not!

I am still trying to make this dream a reality...but it's not easy.

The relay was depressing me...except that two of my favourite Olympians got to carry the torch today...Simon Whitfield and Alexandre Despatie...that brought a smile to my face.

(not my photo)

and really, if Simon Whitfield and Catriona Lemay Doan don't get the torch to themselves (and Alexandre Despatie and Silken Laumen get to share, what chance do I have?)

This post is changing to a chronological event...

7:52pm I start writing this blog
8:30pm my husband comes upstairs to ask me a question...but changes it to "have you been crying?"
I let him read the beginning of my blog...he starts to understand my mindset and is hugging me when the phone rings.

8:35pm our friend calls. I think he's calling because of my question I asked him about accommodation in Vancouver during the Olympic Games and whether it's a possibility if I could get a ticket (he said he would call me rather than email)...

When I get on the phone with him, I realize that he is calling because the Olympic Torch is about to reach where he is and he wants to share it with us.

I put him on speaker...we call the kids up and we all hear he, his family and friends cheering as they watch the Olympic Torch go by in Victoria.

Tears of joy this time!! So happy to see a wonderful friend experience the magic of the Olympic Flame!! I look forward to having my turn in a couple of months...even if I won't get to touch it.

Perfect timing?

Lose Canada Lose

Originally published on My Life Is Like A Song on April 13, 2009

Recently, Canada's teams have not fared as well as they are expected. Our men's team, our women's team and our junior team in curling did not win the World Championships. The women's hockey team has lost to the U.S. two years in a row. Our figure skaters (although very impressively won medals) did not win World Championships (when some media predicted they could).

Many people may be feeling down or disappointed in our teams.

For me, I remember too many teams and athletes arriving at the Olympics as World Champions only to lose at the Olympics. Brian Orser won the Worlds in 1987...but won silver at the Olympics in 1988. Kurt Browning won the Worlds in 1989, 1990, 1991 and 1993 but did not medal at two Olympic Games in 1992 and 1994 while defending champion. Elvis Stojko won the Worlds in 1997 and did not win the Olympics in 1998.  Adam van Koeverden although well decorated, inexplicably faded in the 1000m in 2008. Perdita Felicien hit the first hurdle and fell in 2004. Jeremy Wotherspoon fell at the start of his race in 2002.

There are probably countless more that I can't think of at the moment.

I'm not saying that the teams and athletes who are now losing will win at the Olympics but maybe it will make them a bit hungrier and more motivated for next year.

John Kucera won the World Championships in Downhill skiing, but this sport is not as predictable. The chance of him winning the gold in 2010 is far less than in a sport like curling or hockey so I don't think very competitive and unpredictable sports follow the same rule. I don't think he'll have the same pressure as defending World Champion.

Earlier in the winter, it seemed like our athletes could do no wrong. The "Own the Podium" funding seemed to have given us many great results (exceeding our expectations) going into the Olympics, but secretly I was worried about the expectations on our athletes would be too much for them.

So for now, although I would love to see Canada win more World Championships (because hey, a World Championship is better than nothing), I'm glad we're not winning everything...because I want Canada to win at least one gold medal next year and hopefully many more!!